Navigating the Unspoken Challenges of Midlife Transitions

The term “midlife crisis” entered our vocabulary in the mid-1960’s when Elliott Jaques’s essay “Death and the Mid-Life Crisis” was published in the International Journal of Psychoanalysis. In his article, Jaques described how individuals began to experience deep anxiety and existential reflection around the middle of life, often triggered by the realization of their own mortality.

In the 50 years since Jaques’s essay, we have gathered more understanding of what exactly a “mid-life crisis” is (it's more appropriate to consider it a "midlife transition"; it doesn't have to be a crisis) and what variables are often at play in this disruptive and difficult time in one’s life. A midlife crisis is a period of emotional turmoil or self-reflection that some people experience typically between the ages of 40 and 60, though it can occur earlier or later. It’s often triggered by the realization of aging, mortality, unfulfilled goals, or major life transitions (like children leaving home, career stagnation, or health issues).

Common Characteristics:

• Questioning life choices: Career path, relationships, or personal goals may suddenly feel unsatisfying.

• Desire for change: A need to "start over" or try something new—such as switching careers, moving, or ending relationships.

• Impulsive behavior: Some people react with spontaneous decisions (e.g., buying a sports car, having an affair, making drastic appearance changes).

• Feelings of regret or sadness: Looking back and feeling disappointed about missed opportunities.

• Existential reflection: Thinking more about life’s meaning, purpose, and one’s legacy.

  
  

Is It Real?

While popular in media and culture, psychologists debate whether a midlife crisis is universal or inevitable. Many people pass through midlife without any crisis. For others, it can be a time of growth, reevaluation, and renewed purpose rather than chaos.

It doesn’t necessarily help a person who is experiencing such a troubling time to hear that it is normal. There may be some solace in learning that others struggle with the very same issues we do, but ultimately living through these years is something every person has to do on his or her own. And depending on the weight of the issues we are facing, it can take some time to work through.

If you are wrestling with a mid-life transition of some sort, consider this short list of possible strategies for successfully learning to navigate them.

• Therapy or counseling

• Open communication with loved ones

• Setting new, meaningful goals

• Practicing mindfulness or meditation

• Focusing on health and self-care

  
  

If you are looking for a guide or just someone who understands how difficult these times are, I would love to connect with you. Send me a note and let’s set up a session to chat!